Why does being a parent require us to be mean? I guess I call it firm, but my kids call it mean. I sure feel mean sometimes. Making sure they clean up their messes or do their chores right... the FIRST time. Teaching them that rolling their eyes is a sign of disrespect. Ugh...
I have four beautiful children. I love them all dearly, but only one seems to actually love me all the time. And this is one of those weeks where I wonder if it isn't because he doesn't know any better. Because I am mean.
Now, perhaps I'm feeling sorry for myself. Or maybe I'm just exhausted. I just FEEL like I'm doing it all wrong. I say the same things over and over again and I'm beginning to sound like a broken record. I never wanted to be that mom. But now I realize it's almost necessary to be THAT mom.
Kids don't listen all the time. Kids piss you off from time to time. Kids will test you until you feel your sanity crack. And the only thing you can do is repeat yourself. And hope to God it sticks. And sometimes it does! Oh, what a glorious feeling. But even Velcro stops sticking, glue dries up and rubber cement just comes undone. And we reapply it or replace it. I guess that's what I am. The glue. I might not hold things together all the time, but with a little repetitive application, I at least leave a residue that's damn hard to remove.
I just hope, someday, they will realize I wasn't being mean. I was only trying to mold them into the best darn human beings they could be. Because dammit, I don't want them to have regrets or wasted potential. It's because I'm the glue and I love them.
Oh, and happy half birthday, little man who doesn't think I'm mean. 😘
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